12 hours of sleep

 is it you who seek me in my dreams

you are a new kind of evil

a different shade of dark

you make me cry when i wake 

twist and a pull

 who are you

the one thats calling for me

i feel you pulling on my chest

strong hands with your long fingers nestled through my ribs, 

pressure so hard on my heart it makes me shiver

i feel no pain only shortness of breath

a long slow hold

why wont you come

if you want me to move, would you tell me the direction

im lying so still that the twist of the universe is working on my body like a corkscrew

i wont move ever again

you come to me this time

you come to me.

dreadful desert draught

 my skin does not know you

It only remembers 

     the draught

the stiffness left from

   wet

flooded with affection

    & mirages of touch

it sits in the sun of the day

     light flooding the emptiness

I look at my arm

     where you said your head

                                       would be

I rest my cheek

                dry on dry

        the ground eats my soul

  I crawl my fingers through the ashes

    and cramp my hardened heart until its dust

               to the beating          of yours

not fucking again

 without you i am an infinity of droplets

nothing but atoms split and scattered

your gentle presence assemble me

effortlessly unintentional

i rip apart and you gather

i scramble and you catch

were the perfect pair 

please dont abandon me

again 

gentlemanly silence

heavy was the sound when the gates opened to let the bird out. slow was the dragging of the closing. it was so soft, so gentle. i didnt even realise what had happened until long moments after. when time seem to have changed suddenly. not in speed but in texture. in form and taste. detached and drifting again i felt spaces deep embrace again. my souls companion, ever watching, never understanding, but always surrounding me with cool observing abcence. nothing is recognised, nothing missed. the only thing i can be sure of is the eternal silence, and that it will never, ever. leave me.

iron clad - scar clasped

 Hope is a bird that flutters

in thranged chambers of a draught heart

i didnt carry your abscence 

anymore

every sight was mine

alone

but heavy was this

tiny bird

with its iron wings

after it broke free, this

wretched little heart

echoed with its cries

hollow hollow hard hardened

hollow

solitary celestary

 they named her

Shinra

travelling alone they pulled

Her with their eyes

She turned and became

the dealer of death

sweet release

they whisper

they crawl, they cry